Saturday, December 29, 2012

Christmas Recap 2012

I've got tons to post, being that I haven't had time since my last post.  It's been way more busy than I ever expected and I'm pretty sure it had nothing to do with the fact that I waited until the last minute to get Christmas gifts- AGAIN. Sorry to those of you who got I.O.U.'s.....

So, where should I begin?  Ah, yes, the night before the end of the world.  Thursday, Dec 20, 2012.  (This also happened to be the night before my sister's birthday.  FYI)
Three things I learned that night:
1.  Don't max out your credit cards
2.  Don't eat everything in sight, and
3.  Don't listen to the Mayans.

It's pretty obvious, since I'm posting this entry on December 29, 2012, that the world DID NOT END.  Regress.
I went to the mall last Thursday night and began, YES began, my Christmas shopping... (just in case my feeling was right about the world NOT ending) and checked off a few names.  When I say 'few', I mean just that, a few.  I should also mention my name was on that list more than once for sanity reasons, of course. Oh, and I also got my sister a birthday gift.  Some really expensive (OK, not really, I just wanna sound like an amazing sister), stupid bath bombs or fizzy shit... I don't know...I guess I was thinking she needed to be clean smelling just in case we had to huddle together in some sort of 'end of the world' bunker or underground basement.  Not that, that would save us from the end of the world, but......
Anyway, the mall was packed, as usual, as were the parking lots. Yuck. I already can't stand crowds (unless I'm dancing and I've had a couple drinks) so the pushing and shoving and sweaty smelly people that kept bumping into me were slightly beginning to piss me off.  And for those of you who know me know that germs/bad smells and I do not mix! The smell of armpit and ass had me dry heaving the entire time.  "Um, excuse me sir, your sweat beads just fell on my arm and I really feel like you should stop breathing your toxic green breath down the back of my neck or you will probably have my lunch all over you. Oh, and please feel free to bathe and wear some sort of strong deodorant PRIOR to going out next time."  That was 5 minutes into my three hour mall journey.

There's nothing that will put me in a mood like traffic...and of course, if someone takes the last cupcake. My alter ego graciously takes over and 'profanity' becomes my first language. I hate, hate, HATE when this happens but I'm forced to say such things because of what I see out there.  I have no other choice.  And, I feel much better venting as I go.  My therapist said I should never hold anything in. Make no mistake, I vent with windows shut while smiling all along.  I also add a little head tilt when a really bad word slips.
I made it home safely around 11pm. Still uncertain if the world was actually going to end, I slipped into some nice, silk, jammies and slept with freshly applied makeup.  Totally kidding about the makeup. 

Friday, December 21, 2012
My alarm went off, I opened one eye and realized I was still here.  Now, I was pissed because I maxed out my cards and ate way to much junk food Thursday night at the mall.  This only meant two things; I would still be working (possibly picking up a side job) and working OUT to hopefully get rid of the 20,000 calories consumed while shopping. Shit. But not before some BIRTHDAY CAKE! Yay!!!!
Krista Rae was born 27 years ago! What a day that was! It was cold, rainy, snowy and we walked 20 miles with no shoes, uphill,,,,,OK, I'm exaggerating, but I know, for sure, that's what Gracie would say.  I was so, so happy to have a sister.  She was like my very own doll.  Only this one cried and pooped entirely too much. That was the downside.  The upside: Just precious! I mean, the cutest little munchkin E.V.E.R.!! My everything!
"Happy birthday, Krista Rae! Here's to many more wonderful years, pending the Mayans don't jack with us anymore!  I wish you a lifetime of greatness- I love you!"
We had a small dinner, gifts and cake.  Lot's of cake. :)

Saturday, December 22, 2012
Still here.  Still in debt.  Still not done with Christmas shopping.  *insert frown*
It's 8am and I'm wondering WHY I'm even awake.  First day off and I'm up.  I turn over in hopes that I can get at least another hour of rest, but it was just not happening.  I had tons to do anyway before out trip out of town.  I still had to finish my shopping.  I was thrilled!! (sarcasm implied).
With gifts piled in my basket and my hand on the Lysol spray mini bottle in my pocket, I was ready to stand in line with more people who looked like they opted for no bath and no brushing. C'mon people!  Doesn't anyone out there have consideration for delicate noses anymore???  After an hour of standing in line, I paid for gifts that were not for me and I was finally ready to hit up the next few stores.  Not willingly.  "Family, you're lucky I love you all!"

Our trip home (to Corpus) was well under way around 6:30pm.  A 'shoulda been' two hour trip turned into a ten hour trip thanks to the effing line at Boat N Net! We waited an hour in line just for BNN! Ridiculous.  Don't do the math, it makes no sense.  I know! I know!  Anyway, I don't know what was more exciting...ordering through a PVC pipe or ringing the doorbell to order.
Yes, this is an accurate picture of the 'doorbell' and 'pvc pipe'

Anyway, finally got to bed around 1am.  Not worried about the world ending anymore, I slept in my usual comfy sleepwear, shorts and Spurs tee.  Grandma likes the heater on like 110 degrees, even when it's 98 degrees outside.  Does she think she lives up north?? Hell, I was crispy by 6am just like the damn turkey in the roaster, which more than likely would have 'browned' just fine on the kitchen table!

Sunday, December 23, 2012
aka our 'fake Christmas' (thank you, Danielle).  We celebrated Christmas with Grandma (my dad's side of the family) on Sunday.  This made it easier for those travelling out of town.  Plus, it was a good way to get a whole other Christmas meal! Delicious, by the way.  I loaded up on candied sweet potatoes and Big Red! Can you say sugar?
This year was just as crazy as last year.  It was way too short of a visit but fun, no doubt!  This year instead of ugly Christmas sweaters, we donned themed hand/home made Christmas t-shirts.  Angela did not participate.  I strongly feel that last year we may have slightly traumatized her.  First of all, she didn't have a sweater.  She had a t-shirt.  Second, it was a home made t-shirt- with a picture of a reindeer who's chin resembled that of balls. And I'm 100% sure I don't mean toy balls.  This shirt of hers will forever be talked about! Awesome! lol! A few others did not participate.  Not sure why... because we thriiiive on being made fun of!
We had some really great shirts! Stephanie's shirt was Kevin from Home Alone and her husband, Aaron had the infamous 'leg lamp' shirt.  Both hand made.  Of course, they took home prizes and trophies!
Danielle wore a 'bought' Grinch shirt AND STILL WON!!! What??? I thought they had to be 'handmade'! Second year in a row Tammy and I did not win.  This must be rigged!
Next year looks like we'll be having a 'Best Pajama Christmas'.  Some want a 'glamourous' Christmas, but I hardly think glamorous goes with Red Solo cups and empty containers of cottage cheese that are now filled with butter on the long table that goes from the dining room into the living room.  Just saying! haha...  If, in fact, we cannot decide on our theme for next year, I say we do 'glamouous pajamas'!  Just a thought! Should be interesting to say the least. 
We also had some fun with photo props as well as a balloon popping contest.  Overall, it was a success as always! I love this crazy family!!!!
(See link below for all pictures)
Sunday night we drove in to town just in time to make it to Tony's branch party.  Bowling party.  Not too Christmassy, but fun nonetheless. The food was great, company was great and I walked out with a bottle of champagne as my gift, s.c.o.r.e.!

Oh, did I mention the ride home from Corpus???? Peaceful....

Monday, December 24, 2012
Baked all damn day long. The end.  Just kidding (not about the baking.. that really did happen).  I baked all kinds of goodies.  I baked so much that I was even 15 minutes late to church! Shame on me. But God knows I'm late for everything so I was excused.  :)

After church is when the chaos on DeSoto street began.  God help us.  With a load of loud, sugar-high kids running around, screaming and yelling and wrestling, it was very certain I would need a bottle of something real quick!
Here is the list of kids:
Jacob, 18, my 'not a kid' anymore.  The calm one. He just sits around and watches the destruction happen.
Austin, 12, my kid.  The caregiver of the bunch, however, he tends to join the little kids every now and then.
Nolan, 6, my brother's kid.  The whiner of the group (makes for an exhausting night! lol)
Raeya, 6, my sister's kid.  The head honcho, bossy lady, if you will (makes for added exhaustion)
Joseph, 2, my brother's kid.  This is the kid that does NOT like me for some reason! lol (makes for a fun night for me! *insert evil laugh*)
Then there's Eva, my brother's kid (damn, he has a lot of kids).  Eva just celebrated her first birthday on Christmas. She's walking now, shining her own bald head, getting into everything and singing Karaoke. 

Looking at the list, it doesn't seem so bad.... HOWEVER, those few monsters will make you want to put a hole in your head! They. Are. Rough. 'nuff said.
Dinner was chaotic, thanks to the kids.  All they wanted to do was open gifts.  Selfish. All we wanted to do is eat in peace.  Dinner was delicious but happened in intervals.  Very non-traditional, but traditional in this dysfunctional family. After each person, swallowed their meal in less than 20 seconds, chugged their drinks in less than 2 seconds, separated wrestling kids off of each other and pulled the karaoke baby off the gifts she had sat on, we were ready to open gifts and hopefully sell all the kids on the corner shortly thereafter. Or perhaps, the alternative solution; numb ourselves with Jack and Jose.
The living room was a disaster in a matter of seconds- no lie.  These spawns are C.R.A.Z.Y. We sell cheap, if anyone is interested.  The baby, well, she's a little more expensive because of her blue eyes.  But the others??? DIRT CHEAP! lol
(see link for added pictures)
Tuesday, December 25, 2012
Tuesday was calm.  Really calm.  We spent the day with the Rosales family.  Christmas lunch was at the Hyatt and was splendid! The place itself was gorgeous and the spread of food would have made the richest man melt! It was that good! The decors and set up, well, were awesome! And the best part was there was no clean up afterwards! Talk about eat and run....
We were back at the Rosales house for gifts and a quick game of Storage Wars.  Oh yes, there IS a game.  I did not win and probably will not pursue a career in buying storage units at any point in my lifetime.
Later that night we all enjoyed Django (the D is silent)! Great movie.  I won't give it away, but it's a 'must see'!!!

I have to say this holiday season was a complete success.  I got the best of ALL worlds and more memories to put in my heart.  I couldn't be happier! Before I go, I have to say this;

"To all the families who have suffered loss of their children/loved ones and who did not have the opportunity to see smiling faces on Christmas morning, I AM DEEPLY SORRY.  My heart goes out to each of you.  Please know that each of you are in my prayers.  May God give you comfort, peace and warm your hearts with the precious memories left behind."

The following was mentioned on one of my posts on Face book by a dear family friend.  "Thank you, Ave, for writing this..."

Let us remember this in the meantime, that the seeds we plant in others can prevent this. I understand your anger. It is these seeds, and beliefs of anger, hatred, depression, and isolation that make murder happen. Let us focus on God and seek his guidance on sending us his HOLY SPIRIT to send us the gifts of PEACE, COMFORT, PATIENCE, JOY, AND LOVE at all times. To truly make us listen to signs and symptoms of bullying, ridicule, persecution, loneliness and depression and replace them with defense, acceptance, friendliness, fellow shipping, and joy, peace, comfort and love in their lives. Make time for people like this and make them feel important, special, kind, and acknowledged. You can make a difference in people's lives as well as all of us can do with the way we respond to them. Do not react, this goes without thinking, just doing whatever comes to mind, which is usually stupidity. Respond is breathing God's life in us slowly, thinking, using God's wisdom to serve one another and love one another as Jesus serves us and loves us. Make it a worthy counted blessed day and please pray for this community and our world.

New Year is right around the corner! May you, friends and family, be blessed beyond belief! I love each of you for obvious reasons!!! God bless us all and CHEERS!!!

P.S. Here is the link to my new site Lights, Camera, Smile.  Here you can see pictures from Christmas.  Enjoy!!!

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