Sin is a Four Letter Word

I'm on the edge of letting go completely of someone I love.  The love that I've freely given has not been reciprocated the way it should be.  There are lies, hurt and anger that have now taken the place of laughter, happiness and truth.  Depression slowly tries to manipulate my life.  These feelings are not of God.  I will not allow someone to control my emotion,  this is emotional abuse as far as I'm concerned.  The hurt is deep and repairing that seems impossible right now.  The trust is no longer, therefore, a solid foundation has not been established.  The anger is deep as well.  But slowly with God's love and guidance, I am able to continue moving forward.  I'm able to still love, regardless! Incredible!  I'm fascinated how God's love for me still outweighs every other ungodly feeling that has been imposed on my heart.  Sin is a four letter word that destroys you inside and out.  It destroys relationships that could've been.  It's a haven full of disease.  Heaven only knows if any of what I'm saying makes sense.  It's like brainstorming in a storm.  But I know, this too, shall pass.  God promises that.  I must be still and patient.  I must still praise him in the storm.  I must still be thankful for my blessings around me AND I AM!!!
The words below hold true in a sense and I relate to them in a way. Some of the lines in italics hit home the hardest for me.
When you love a sinner
You hate the sin
You hate the temptress in a bottle, for choosin' him again
and you blame the cold for the winter
When you love a sinner.
I tell myself that every thing's okay
I paint a pretty smile on my face
You're lovin' says, "he'll change"
but on his breath and in his veins
the truth still remains
deep down, you know
that's it's a crime
you know you didn't pull the trigger, but you're the one who does the time
and you pay the debt, and you're the lender
when you love a sinner
I tell myself that every thing's okay
I paint a pretty smile on my face
But I'm slowly lettin' go
'cause in my heart I know, that I can't make him better
and I've been goin' under and now I understand
you can't tread water with a drowning man
I love a sinner
I justify it how I can
so, it's the sin I'm leaving, not the man.
*sung beautifully by Martina McBride

I ask at this time for prayer, if you would.  I miss me.  I want that strong girl back like yesterday! Thank you and much love
~me