New Year Resolution: Lose Weight, Excercise...WHAT A CLICHE!

I'm on day 4 of my 'healthy eating' and hating it!  I'm accustomed to eating all the wrong things and feel so confused as to what's right and what's wrong to eat!  So many books, recipes, comments, diet pills (not that I want to take them), so many protein drinks, different exercise routines, etc. etc.!!! It's all overwhelming to a trashcan like myself!  I remember when I weighted 128, to be exact, had a waistline and felt wonderful in my clothes.  Today I weigh,,,,ya, right,,,like I'm gonna tell everyone! Let's just say I'm a couple pounds heavier, two kids down and don't feel the way I want to feel.  Don't get me wrong, I'm a happier girl these days with all the blessings that have been given to me, but I would love to have that 'overall' good healthy feeling.  It wouldn't hurt to be able to wear a swimsuit without wondering if I'm wearing any bottoms!  lol  just kidding! But honestly, overall health is really what I'm wanting.  I'm not even concerned with the number on the scale because I totally would be happy weighing 140 if I were just toned!

It's amazing that I don't weigh half a ton after all these years of eating junk (God has been good to me)! I really should be tipping the scale at about 700 pounds, the way I eat.  I love to eat!!!  It's been there for me my whole life and being a picky child, I feel that I missed out on a lot of good stuff, therefore, I'm simply making up for lost time/taste! It's sucks that all the healthy stuff is not only expensive, but doesn't taste so good.  I mean, who wants cauliflower and peas as a side?  Not I!  "I'll have some starch and calories please."  I just recently started tasting broccoli and a few other veggies.  I know, I know, "they're good for you", ya, ya, I've heard it all, but they taste so much better with butter! 

Despite the fact that I love junk food, I've made a really tough decision to monitor what I eat and incorporate a little bit more physical activity into my life.  This is really hard for me, but I've taken the first few steps.  Any advice will be greatly appreciated!  Don't be mean! lol  My goal is to lose about 10-20 pounds AND FEEL GOOD.  I don't have a timeline, but I'm hoping to feel swimsuit worthy by summer!!  Any exercise ideas, routines, etc. will also be greatly appreciated.  I also don't want to completely cut out the foods I really love and enjoy. I'm thinking of using one day to 'reward' myself (portion control-of course) for all my dedication and hard work!  Thoughts?  Keep in mind that I have a lower back that is not very strong (could be because I'm so out of shape).  I'll work on strengthening that as well- but slowly!

I'm motivated to do this, but would loooooove the extra motivation from my friends and family. I want to look great in my wedding dress!  No, I'm not getting married, but when I do, I need to look drop dead gorgeous!!!!  If all else fails, I won't invite anyone to my wedding and use photo shop in my wedding photos! lol

1-3-2012-
For breakfast I had an orange and oatmeal.  For lunch I enjoyed (ha) a lean cuisine and some yogurt. I was in the break room at work and this was staring at me the whole time:

How the hell am I supposed to resist the biggest box of chocolates I've ever seen????  I mean, really!  Take a look at the pic.  Are you gonna tell me that the left side of the pic looks better than the right??  Didn't think so, but good news is I ate some yogurt and had only 1 piece of chocolate!  Normally, I would've picked at that all day long and made Whitman's very happy!  So, whatever,,, yay me! lol

Well, not fully equipped to master this 'healthy eating' phase, day one back at work, I didn't have anything else to hold me over until dinner.  Boy, was large marge (my tummy)  pissed! I couldn't even see straight!  I guess the 10 almonds did her no justice!

For dinner I baked fish with a side of corn and salad.  Water washed my meal down for me.  Just another side note:  I hate water!  I love sodas! I usually have two or three sodas a day.  That's probably the majority of my weight gain,,, along with the margaritas and chips and salsa!  Anyway, dinner was delicious!  Totally satisfying!  I can do this!  I can totally do this!  30 days and my aunt (who told me at Christmas time that there was a whole lot more of me to hold this year) won't even recognize me! lol 
Let the thin begin!